Who is Gopher?

Well, that's a pretty existential question. Frankly, I don't know and I don't like to think about it,
but I can give you a list of facts.

About Me

  • You can call me Gopher. Gopher G. Galster. That's not my government name, obviously, but it's who I am on this Wild Web.

  • I'm agender, and not out about that to anyone in meatspace. I go by all pronouns, no preference. However, I do like when folks change 'em up a little! When I use gendered terms for myself here, I just pick whatever sounds funniest to me. Feel free to do the same.

  • Keep in mind that I'm queer and I use the term freely. If we must use specific labels for attraction, I'm bisexual and demisexual/romantic. I'm single and have never been in a serious relationship.

  • Born in Point Pleasant, West Virginia(home of the Mothman), raised in southeastern Ohio, with both sides of my family from Kentucky, I feel a strong connection to my Appalachian roots. The history, peoples, and traditions of the area are all honestly fascinating, and it's a shame that all most folks know about are the hillbilly stereotypes. And the cryptids.

  • Religion isn't really a big part of my personal life. I grew up on the edge of the bible belt, but I personally identify myself as an atheist. My mother was spiritual, my dad was agnostic (he's currently into kabalist theory), and my papal (mom's dad) was a free-will baptist. If I have to believe in anything, it's the entropy of the universe. All we can count on is chaos. There is no meaning to anything, so I make my own.

  • I've been using the internet since I was a kid, as most gen Z have, but, since I grew up poor, some of my tech experiences are more in line with gen Z-cusp. I miss windows xp more than most family members. And mp3 players. And the ps2. The modern teno-capitalist dystopia drains me.

  • Since 2021, I've been working of getting a BFA in general visual arts. I enjoy drawing/painting with traditioal media, but I use digital a lot. Last fall, I took a ceramics course, and I have to say that clay might be one of my true loves.

  • I've been drawing since I was 10, so it's been about a decade of art for me.

  • Aside from visual arts, I enjoy writing quite a bit! I struggle to focus on it sometimes though, so I don't have much to show for it. Still, my silly little stories bring me joy.

  • I cycle through my hyperfixations like they're a spinning spice rack. Every winter, I obsess over Assassin's Creed (the Desmond saga, specifically) and summer is the time of Mortal Kombat (specifically the original timeline, plus MKX). Spring and autumn kinda swap around a lot, but usually it's horror films, DC comics, Warrior Cats, or MLP (generations 1-3).

  • Other interests that I don't talk about as much include: true crime/paranormal/conspiracy podcasts (in the same way I enjoy game lore. I just find them fascinating), Minecraft (I play Bedrock edition. And kinda want to make a page about my long-term world), Queer history, anti-diet culture podcasts (I'm very fond of Maintainance Phase and Fad Camp), and internet history.

My Internet History

There's honestly not much to say, sadly. I grew up with dial up and an older style of desktop computer for the first 8 years of my life. I didn't surf the web much, but when I did it was to read wikipedia and download cute little images. When I talk about having fond memories of older web design, I'm talking about 2008-2013ish. The later end of that was when I really started to understand what the internet was. I started watching youtube in 2012 (of which Markiplier was my actual first subscription. Shoutout to Spongebob Slendypants) and made my first attempt at carving a space out for myself on this land of 1s and 0s in 2014. When I begged my dad to let me make a Quizilla account. I had been reading a story on that site (I believe it was called "I'm not your f***ing princess!" or something like that) and really wanted to make my own stories and quizzes. Which, ah, didn't happen. Considering the site shut down in october of that year. Big sad for Gopher.

That year, or the next, I made a Wattpad account, posted two stories, deleted one, then left. I made a dA account in 2016, felt completely alone (my goals with the internet have always been to find community and friendship) and have rarely used the site since. After my mom died in 2018, I spent a year feeling isolated, then finally decided to make my tumblr blog the following year. It was like striking gold. I met my best friend and sibling-by-choice, Corey, bonded with folks over a love of horror movies, and got the community I had always wanted. Which has been awesome, frankly, but it's always been missing something. I always heard about the Hellsite as some Wild West of the internet- a place of freedom and opportunity, and it's been that for the most part. But you see, I joined after the Great Porn Ban, during a time when the site has been adopting the values of other social media sites. Sure, there's more room to breathe than Instagram or Facebook- and it's a helluva lot prettier, but a gilded cage is still a cage. And I wanted more than that.

So that brought me here. This is my new opportunity to make a home for myself in cyberspace. A place with the most freedom I've seen yet. Thanks for taking this journey with me.

RAPID FIRE GOPHER FUN FACTS

  • My favorite color is red. Blood red, especially (sorry if thats a bit edgy! I just love dark colors)

  • I have three pets: a black cat named Panther (also sometimes Beanie or Beanie Baby), a black Australian Shepherd named Diesel (aka: Big Boy, Bees, or Beastie),
    and a small mutt named Loki (the lad, Lad Boy, or Little Bastard). I grew up with horses, goats, and chickens as a kid, but don't have any of those now.

  • My eyesight sucks. I can't function without my glasses. I can't handle strong light. And I experience VSS (Visual Snow Syndrome. Basically my vision has
    tv static over it. Relatedly, I have really bad tinitus. Both of which I've had since my early childhood.

  • I was a gifted student. Unsurprisingly, I'm also nuerodivergent.

  • My face naturally makes me look pissed off. Or depressed. Sometimes both.

  • I'm terrified of Nicholas Cage.